You can only change living.
Saturday morning I was driving down Interstate-25 heading back home after a bike ride with friends at the Air Force Academy when I noticed traffic slowing down near an on-ramp. As I let off the gas and edged closer I could see that some sort of accident had happened, except it wasn't involving two cars...it seemed to involve a person. Then I saw it in broad daylight. A guy was lying on his side in the middle of the on-ramp clearly unconscious, his head spilling blood onto the road. Even as I drove by at 50mph I could see it. There were cars stopped and an ambulance coming up the road.
This isn't something you expect to see on a beautiful, clear-sky Saturday morning. I wasn't thinking about death or how short life is (even though that's the title of my blog). This hit me hard.
I drove home with a sick feeling, deep in the pit of my stomach. Looking at the situation, I would have guessed it was a man trying to cross the ramp and he was likely hit by a car coming fast around the corner, getting ready to enter the interstate at 60+mph. That's actually pretty close to the story, turns out he's still alive. Click link for the story.
But none of that really mattered at the time. I didn't know anything about the guy or the situation. All I could think was that he was someone's son, lying there awaiting certain death. Maybe a brother or a dad or an uncle. Maybe he served our country at one time. I just kept thinking what a difficult thing it is to witness someone's death. I really thought with the blood I saw, actively flowing from his head, that he was already meeting his undertaker.
You have a feeling inside of you and in the moment it's hard to even know what to do with it.
Ever since I was young I have always looked at life as a very short-term endeavor. I don't mean to sound pitiful because there are many kids who had it harder than I did. But when I think back I can remember seeing life a lot different than my friends. I'm not sure what gave me such a deep sense that this was all so temporary. I'm not sure that most 7 yr olds think very much about death. But once my great-grandmother passed and I attended the funeral, I understood what the adults never came out and said.
We're alive for a finite number of days.
You can say you go to Heaven when you die. Fact is that none of us have ever been there. We have faith or we're guessing or we're hoping. Some die brave. Some die scared. Some die with family and friends at their bedside and others die alone.
You see when I read the words, "your life is ending one minute at a time," I hear it for what it is. Death has been a friend of mine for most of my years on this earth. This wasn't by choice, I just learned early that life was a gift and you never knew when it would be gone. It's the ultimate form of change. And humans have a fear of change in general. But what I fear most is wasting the time I have to breath. I've always feared that. We can't change dying but we can change living.
In my mind I can still see that guy lying in the middle of the road, clinging to the shred of life left inside him. To witness someone losing the battle is powerful. It's only a matter of time before each of us wakes up for the last time. Are you happy? Do you love people and do you have people that love you? If so, what else could you possibly be chasing? What else are you worried about?
Do you see where you are wasting time?
I tell you, be warned. You can't change dying, you can only change living.
This isn't something you expect to see on a beautiful, clear-sky Saturday morning. I wasn't thinking about death or how short life is (even though that's the title of my blog). This hit me hard.
I drove home with a sick feeling, deep in the pit of my stomach. Looking at the situation, I would have guessed it was a man trying to cross the ramp and he was likely hit by a car coming fast around the corner, getting ready to enter the interstate at 60+mph. That's actually pretty close to the story, turns out he's still alive. Click link for the story.
But none of that really mattered at the time. I didn't know anything about the guy or the situation. All I could think was that he was someone's son, lying there awaiting certain death. Maybe a brother or a dad or an uncle. Maybe he served our country at one time. I just kept thinking what a difficult thing it is to witness someone's death. I really thought with the blood I saw, actively flowing from his head, that he was already meeting his undertaker.
You have a feeling inside of you and in the moment it's hard to even know what to do with it.
Ever since I was young I have always looked at life as a very short-term endeavor. I don't mean to sound pitiful because there are many kids who had it harder than I did. But when I think back I can remember seeing life a lot different than my friends. I'm not sure what gave me such a deep sense that this was all so temporary. I'm not sure that most 7 yr olds think very much about death. But once my great-grandmother passed and I attended the funeral, I understood what the adults never came out and said.
We're alive for a finite number of days.
You can say you go to Heaven when you die. Fact is that none of us have ever been there. We have faith or we're guessing or we're hoping. Some die brave. Some die scared. Some die with family and friends at their bedside and others die alone.
You see when I read the words, "your life is ending one minute at a time," I hear it for what it is. Death has been a friend of mine for most of my years on this earth. This wasn't by choice, I just learned early that life was a gift and you never knew when it would be gone. It's the ultimate form of change. And humans have a fear of change in general. But what I fear most is wasting the time I have to breath. I've always feared that. We can't change dying but we can change living.
In my mind I can still see that guy lying in the middle of the road, clinging to the shred of life left inside him. To witness someone losing the battle is powerful. It's only a matter of time before each of us wakes up for the last time. Are you happy? Do you love people and do you have people that love you? If so, what else could you possibly be chasing? What else are you worried about?
Do you see where you are wasting time?
I tell you, be warned. You can't change dying, you can only change living.
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| When you feel like you are drifting, just remember no matter where you go, you are still you. That is your only obligation. |
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